I did it! After a year of talking about it (and planning and buying fabric), I finally made covers for our crates!
Bonus: they're removable and thus washable!
Thank you Laura Gunn for your Undercover Crate instructions that made this possible. These crates were a different size from her original pattern (before photos of the crates would have proven incriminating), but her math equations for changing the dimensions were right on.
These fit beautifully!