Those were the sentiments I shared on Facebook after Day Two sitting in the midst of our "things" during our moving sale. I had good intentions of updating on our whole eliminating/packing/moving process; then life happened.
In short, we decided to "sell it all" and move select belongings in a smaller trailer behind our Volvo, leading us to the moving sale option. Overall, the sale was successful helping us earn some money for a furniture replacement fund. We have a couple larger items we'll continue to try and sell on Craigslist before we move in less than two weeks, while the smaller items sit in our carport waiting to be donated.
Feeling overwhelmed by all our things and all the many things still to be sorted inside, I did what usually gives me perspective: I left Ian "safe" in the papasan (am I a terrible mother?) to get the camera, take a picture and blog about it. In the update photo of our sale, I found some diamonds in the rough.
The photo above brought it all into perspective for me.
Frankly, "things" have me worn out. I'm tired of picking them up, feeling like I'm failing at getting them out of our house, and feeling like it's all keeping me from what (who) is truly important. I want so bad to give up. I'm exhausted, and meanwhile our house is a disaster (I mean, the floors underneath our stuff disgust me), Brylee needs attention, date nights have turned into sleep-early nights, and Ian needing attention has become an interference to this side distraction of processing "things."
We began the process of loading the unsold items in the car, Daniel finding an item or two that he wouldn't let me rid of. I won't share what the items were/are, because many (most?) will side with him. It's not that I've lost my sentimentalism or that I am not thinking these things through. The point, I think, is that I am very much thinking each item through. I feel I am going through the processes necessary to make this new, simple life a lasting one, and it's trying but worth it.
The desire to surrender comes when these careful decisions are questioned; when the process and temporary turmoil I've faced to get to this point of letting go is resurfaced and I am expected to reprocess. That is exhausting. And that is what led me to realize how much "things" cramp my style.
All that time spent wanting, researching, buying, receiving, picking up, organizing, sorting, eliminating, moving, removing, throwing out, and selling "things" is exhausting and time consuming and expensive and unhealthy and selfish. Don't my little gems deserve better?
Yes! They do.
And the cycle ends here. Not easily. Not without dealing with the things already in my life. But I look forward to the relaxation and space and quality time that await us on the other side.
Find my other posts in this series linked >> here.