Each time I'm in the kitchen, Brylee trips me up with her little wooden chair ready to help. Anyone with young kids knows this effort is not so much helpful as it is a good learning experience. However, when I have a cranky toddler crying at my leg, I'm trying to peel potatoes and whip up pancake batter before we all meltdown from hunger--it's just not a good time for such "help."
Today was one of those days I really needed her to play with her brother in the other room freeing me to prepare everything quickly. Of course, she doesn't like this idea.
"But, mo-om! I want to he-elp." Her whiny reply tells me she's not buying my direction for her involvement. Which, by the way, would have been so helpful and appreciated.
She aimlessly wanders around the kitchen whining about other things she wants, while Ian continues to cry for food and attention. My mind wanders to my earlier attempt at writing today's blog post--Books that Put Faith in Action.
Struggling to find the words and the format, this list of books and their mini-reviews just isn't lining up. Yet, I kept pushing it. Finding ways around my block, set in my determination to make this post idea happen. Because I want to be more open to being used by God--I want to help.
In one of the books...
... she's 21 when she prays her life over to God--with contingencies. She doesn't want to leave her home country (England), she wants to get married young, and she doesn't want to speak in front of people. One by one, God leads her to surrender her expectations to follow His plan. She serves in all sorts of countries, speaks to large audiences, and marries in her forties.
She shares this poem as a reflection of her experience--also her inspiration for naming the book:
I said to the man who stood at the gate of the year,
"Give me a light that I may tread safely into the unkown."
And he replied, "Go out into the darkness
And put your hand into the hand of God.
That shall be to you better than light
And safer than a known way!"
-Minnie Louise Haskins, 1908
It could have turned out so much differently if she clung to her little wooden stool and said, "No, Lord, this is how I want to help You. Just let me help You!"
Instead, she put her faith in God, her hand in His, and trusted His way really would be the best--for her and for reaching others for Him. And it was. Her experiences smuggling Bibles, learning under Tante Corrie (who we might better know as Corrie ten Boom), and so much more are proof that God's way was best.
Throughout preparing supper--telling Brylee her way of helping is not helpful right now and thinking about how to write this post--it becomes painfully obvious: I'm a five-year-old girl whining to God that I just want to help.
"Just use me, ple-ease!" I whine.
The truth is, I'm not always open to how He is wanting to use me. I don't trust that He cares what goes into these little posts--as long as its something that points to Him. Maybe--just a hunch--I need to set my stool aside and listen to Him. Maybe it's time for me to believe that God wants to work in my life (and my writing) in powerful ways to be used for His work.
Pamela briefly shares her story in this >> video, and concludes, "God knew how to write my story far better than I could have imagined... Are you willing to let Him write your story?"
I say that I'm willing, but it's time to make that faith real and put it into action. It's time to put my hand into God's,
even especially in the day-to-day stuff like what I post today. Or how I interact with my family. Or what I talk to my friends about. That trust and faith in action will be better than light and safer than my known way.
Because He knows how to write my story and make it good for His glory.